Dear Lucy

Dear Lucy

Hey Lulu,

So, it’s been two years. Just thinking about the time breaks my heart a little. Okay, let’s be real – it breaks my heart a lot. I mean, two years ago today, it was hard to imagine time continuing at all, let alone two years worth of it, but… Here we are.

But you know, the funny thing about time is that, it really doesn’t make some things easier. It doesn’t make some things hurt any less. Time doesn’t behave as a permanent solution; stitches to the wound. No… Time is nothing more than one of those shitty fabric Band-aids that refuses to stay on in the shower. The little fuckers keep falling off, and I just keep buying more. Maybe one day I’ll remember to pick up the waterproof kind, or maybe I like that it still hurts – some days, a little; other days, a lot. Maybe I like that I always have that nagging reminder of what, who I lost.

My four-legged soulmate.

My Lucy Tucy.

I still remember that day like it was yesterday.

Wait, no, I remember everything leading up to that day. The day I got you. The days you slept in a laundry basket because you were too small to be left on your own. The days you’d get hyper as fuck because I was listening to Hanson. The day you managed to get into the crawlspace. The days I didn’t put you first, and the days I spent regretting it. The days you were there when nobody else was. The days we’d dance together, and the days we’d do nothing but play WoW. The days I was sick and you were there, the days I felt great and you were there, and the days when I couldn’t get myself out of my own head…and you were there.

The day you weren’t yourself.
The day I lived with you in the bathroom, singing to you and telling you the story of us.
And then, the day we said goodbye, and those blessed few moments when I first woke up, and I almost believed everything was okay.

God, Lu, that first year was hell. You don’t even know, or hey, maybe you do, but I’m telling you anyway. It was horrible, that first year. I questioned everything. I drove myself insane. All those miserable nights, all those fake-smile days. Thank God for Keegan, right? Thank God for Ethel, right? Thank God for everything that managed to keep me afloat, right?

This past year was a little different. This past year was a little more about living, wasn’t it? I mean, a lot has changed. Karen had another baby, Ethel’s become a really good friend, and I am obscenely obsessed with Outlander. And that book I was always writing? It’s done, it’s out. That other book? That draft is done, it’s ready to be finished. All those short stories I was writing? They’re on their way. I’m living one of those dreams I always wished you’d be there for, but… I guess you still are. I just wish I could feel you at night.

Anyway, my baby butt, I just wanted to say hi. I wanted to let you know that this day still sucks, will always suck, and I’m thinking about you. I’m always thinking about you. I hope I never stop hearing you, seeing you out of the corner of my eye, and I hope I never stop slipping your name into songs.

I’ll see you later, Lucy. I miss you.

I love you.

You will rest your head, your strength once saving.
And when you wake you will fly away,
holding tight to the legs of all your angels.
Goodbye my love, into your blue, blue eyes,
in your blue, blue world, you and me forever.

-Dave Matthews Band, “Baby Blue”

Usable Songs

Yesterday, I saw John Mayer for the second time this year. Not sure if it’s caught on yet, but I am a massive fan of music, in particular live music. There is nothing that makes me feel more alive than live music. Absolutely nothing.

So, John Mayer is one of my absolute favorites. The guy is, in my opinion, a lyrical and musical genius. The guy writes these songs that force me to play them over and over again, listening intently until a story has been born in my head and I have to write it down. The guy is, for lack of a better word, a muse in my life, brought to me in the form of his songs.

If you haven’t read ENOUGH, then let me tell you right now, it was inspired by his song “Edge of Desire.” It was the first bit of writing that I publicly released, putting it out there despite the fear and self-doubt. It will always hold a special place in my heart, and so will John Mayer for writing the song that made it happen.

Anyway, the first time I had seen Mr. Mayer this year, I had been harassing him for months beforehand, asking him to play “Edge of Desire.” I needed to hear this song live, it having such special meaning to me and all. But as luck would have it, he didn’t play it.

That was fine, though, because shortly after, I bought tickets for another of his shows. This time, I harassed him for months, asking for a completely different song, which he also didn’t play. And you know what? Maybe I should just stop harassing the guy, because he obviously has some issues listening to requests, but that’s not what this post is about. This post is about something else. This post is those “simply meant to be” moments, those “this was no coincidence” moments in life that make you think, “Holy crap,” and make you want to cry.
Continue reading “Usable Songs”

Becoming an Aunt: An Excerpt

Today, August 17th, marks the second birthday of my best little buddy, my nephew Keegan. He is the most special little kid I know. The smartest, the funniest, the cutest, the absolute coolest with the most awesome Aunt Steppies a kid could ask for.

Nothing wrong with a little self-flattery every now and then, right?

Anywho, there are a million things I could say about him, my little Bloop Bloop, but I don’t think WordPress has the capacity to handle a post like that. So, instead I thought I would post another excerpt from my current work in progress, Sleeping to Dream. It seemed to be the most fitting to share on this day, and I hope you enjoy.

Continue reading “Becoming an Aunt: An Excerpt”

Giveaway Alert!

Hey there, dear readers. I have a little bit o’ exciting news to share with you all.

Over on Goodreads, there’s a Holly Freakin’ Hughes giveaway happening right this second. It will end on the 19th, so be sure to check it out now if you’re interested.

I promise a real entry will be coming soon. Been a wee bit busy, you know what I mean?

Goodreads Book Giveaway

Holly Freakin' Hughes by Kelsey Kingsley

Holly Freakin' Hughes

by Kelsey Kingsley

Giveaway ends August 19, 2017.

See the giveaway details
at Goodreads.

Enter Giveaway

Holly Freakin’ Hughes is LIVE!


Today is the day, folks. Today is the day that Holly Freakin’ Hughes went live on Amazon. Today is the day I feel like a real author. It’s an incredible feeling, it’s a stressful feeling, it’s…honestly amazing.

It’s funny, actually. I was saying to my sisters earlier that I feel as though something big should have changed in the world on this day. A shifting of the planets or a changing of the Earth’s overall climate. Something, anything. Yet, I woke up today, and everything seemed the same. The time still changed as it always had, the humidity fogged up my eyeballs the way that it always did in the middle of the ass-swampy summer… Initially, I’ll be honest – I was disappointed. I mean, in my mind, there should have been parades. Fireworks. Air shows. Where was the goddamn marching band, trumpeting a rousing rendition of “We Are the Champions”?

But then… Sitting here, on my bed, working on the next book… I felt it. The world is different, if only in a small way. Because you know why? I’m out there now. I’ve made my debut, and this is only the beginning.

You can order Holly Freakin’ Hughes NOW on Amazon HERE:
AMAZON US: ttp://

In William’s Room: An Excerpt

The release date for Holly Freakin’ Hughes is approaching at lightning speed, guys. I can hardly believe it’s coming so fast. Like, where the hell is all this time going? We all say it, but…damn. Seriously nuts.

Now, I know the book isn’t even officially released yet, but I want to tell you guys a little something… I’m already working on the next book, and it’s well underway. Holly Freakin’ Hughes is intended to be a series, a trilogy at least, but this next book will be something else entirely. Something more, uh, paranormal. Something more…historical? More lovey-dovey? More sickeningly sweet? I don’t know what to even call it, honestly. It’s something completely different than anything I’ve ever done in all of my, uh, thirty-something years of throwing story ideas around. To be honest, I fucking love it and I am pumped as all hell to let y’all read it. But for now, I’m going to leave you with a little excerpt of what will be titled Sleeping to Dream, the story of Drew McAdams and William Fuller.

I hope y’all enjoy.

Continue reading “In William’s Room: An Excerpt”

Holly Freakin’ Hughes Soundtrack

So, in addition to being an incredibly kickass writer, I am also a music lover (as you might have gathered from posts like THIS or THIS). Music is an incredibly important part of my life – an incredibly important part of who I am as a person – and so, I pretty much make soundtracks for everything. My books are no exception.

I thought it would be a fun little thing to list the songs and accompanying YouTube videos for the songs that helped to create Holly Freakin’ Hughes. I thought I could do this for every book I release, because trust me – every book has a soundtrack. Every piece of my writing is in some part inspired by music, most scenes are set to a song, and I’d like to share that with you all.

So, without further ado…
Continue reading “Holly Freakin’ Hughes Soundtrack”